Cover image for Facing the ultimate loss : coping with the death of a child
Facing the ultimate loss : coping with the death of a child
Marx, Robert J.
Personal Author:
Publication Information:
Fredonia, Wis. : Champion Press, [2003]

Physical Description:
218 pages ; 22 cm
Format :


Call Number
Material Type
Home Location
Item Holds
BF575.G7 M38 2003 Adult Non-Fiction Non-Fiction Area
BF575.G7 M38 2003 Adult Non-Fiction Open Shelf

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With understanding and wisdom, Robert J. Marx and Susan Davidson explore the journey we embark on after the ultimate loss-the death of a child. The authors delve into the difficult emotions parents face, including sadness, guilt, anger, powerlessness and questions about our faith. Drawing on the stories of the many people they have counseled, and their own experiences, the authors share the challenges of this unique passage through grief.

Reviews 1

Library Journal Review

The authors of this poignant book about losing a child come from both sides of the experience: Wengerhoff is a grief therapist, and Marx, a bereaved parent and rabbi. Geared toward parents as well as clergy, social workers, medical professionals, psychiatrists, family, and friends, their book has a reassuring tone, yet asks the hard questions: Why survive? How can we look forward to tomorrow? Am I going crazy? As in most bereavement and grief literature, the authors acknowledge that people mourn in different ways, that there is strength in memories, and that faith in God is a healing resource. They describe the effect of the child's death on each parent's relationships with other children, family, and spouse. A discussion of separation ceremonies and religious traditions emphasizes Judaism, with frequent Bible references. A similar book from a Christian perspective is John Munday and Frances Wohlenhaus-Munday's Surviving the Death of a Child. A better alternative is Barbara D. Rosof's The Worst Loss: How Families Heal from the Death of a Child, an understanding yet methodical exploration of bereavement that, unlike this book, includes valuable resources, a bibliography, and an index. Public libraries should purchase only where there is heavy demand for these materials.-Rachel R. Baum, Upper Hudson Lib. Syst., Albany, NY (c) Copyright 2010. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.

Table of Contents

Introductionp. 9
Chapter 1 Darkness: Can I ever accept the fact that my child is dead?p. 15
Chapter 2 Who Am I Now? Recognizing myselfp. 26
Chapter 3 How Can We Ever Say Good-bye? Ceremonies of separationp. 39
Chapter 4 Fingerprints in Timep. 52
Chapter 5 Do Our Children Ever Die? A Biblical Parablep. 60
Midway in the Journeyp. 71
Chapter 6 There Is Never Enough Timep. 73
Chapter 7 Into That Dark Night: How did your child die?p. 96
Chapter 8 Bonds That Can Never Be Shatteredp. 112
Chapter 9 Angerp. 122
Chapter 10 Guiltp. 132
Chapter 11 Changed Hopes--Changed Livesp. 139
Chapter 12 The Family in Transitionp. 150
Chapter 13 Mourning Out of Controlp. 168
Chapter 14 The Search for Faithp. 186
Chapter 15 The Awesome Revelation: How can I face the future without my child?p. 200
Epilogue: The Elevatorp. 211