Cover image for What about the big stuff? : finding strength and moving forward when the stakes are high
Title:
What about the big stuff? : finding strength and moving forward when the stakes are high
Author:
Carlson, Richard, 1961-2006.
Edition:
First edition.
Publication Information:
New York : Hyperion, [2002]

©2002
Physical Description:
x, 294 pages ; 22 cm
Language:
English
ISBN:
9780786868841
Format :
Book

Available:*

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BF637.L53 C37 2002 Adult Non-Fiction Open Shelf
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BF637.L53 C37 2002 Adult Non-Fiction Open Shelf
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Summary

Summary

With more than 21 million copies in print, Richard Carlson's bestselling Don't Sweat series has shown countless families, lovers, and workers how not to sweat the small stuff. Now, in his soothing and wise trademark tone, Carlson takes a different approach and discusses life's bigger issues, including dealing with the death of a loved one; how divorce affects your family and friends; confronting illness, whether in yourself or others; and managing difficult financial situations. In chapters such as 'Bouncing Back from Divorce,' 'Finding Life After Death,' and 'Feel Free to Grieve,' Carlson offers healing insight and heartfelt advice on how to find inner peace and strength to deal with the big stuff.

Don't Sweat the Big Stuff, but instead:

Learn from the Big Stuff Grieve Freely Ask Yourself the Question, 'Will This Matter a Year from Now?' Reflect on What You're Going to Want to Say--Before You Need to Say It Prepare and Let Go


Author Notes

Author and psychotherapist Richard Carlson was born on May 16, 1961 and grew up in Piedmont, California. He received his undergraduate degree from Pepperdine University, his Ph.D. in psychology from Sierra University, and an honorary law degree from Pepperdine University. Before becoming a full-time author, he was a psychotherapist in private practice. His wrote 30 books that deal with psychological and spiritual health, including the Don't Sweat the Small Stuff series. He was a supporter of the National Center for Family Literacy. He died of cardiac arrest on December 13, 2006.

(Bowker Author Biography)


Reviews 2

Publisher's Weekly Review

In Carlson's bestselling Don't Sweat books, he declares that the right perspective can help everyday troubles seem less worrisome. Here he attempts to answer a question he received from thousands of readers. Tackling the "big stuff"-e.g., death, divorce, illness, September 11-Carlson offers a kind of advanced-level self-help book that's as heartfelt and useful as his "small stuff" guides. "Fortunately, a vast majority... is small stuff.... However, there's no denying that `big stuff' exists," he admits. The key to handling it, he says, is to prepare by learning how to practice inner peace. If one is ready, according to Carlson, one can better handle pain. Drawing on Eastern and Western religions, he advises readers on mourning a loved one's death ("Healing from a loss is a natural process of life-just as healing from a broken bone is") and coping with why that person had to die so soon ("The first step toward inner peace... is admitting the fact that we simply don't know certain answers"). He also shares Mother Teresa's thoughts on doing "small things with great love"-since cultivating compassion can help one prepare for big stuff-as well as Buddhist philosophies on the power of forgiveness. Many of the messages readers have heard repeatedly in churches, synagogues, memorial services and even on Oprah. But dealing with the repercussions of September 11 and massive job layoffs, people want and need to hear them again. Carlson's many real-life examples of folks going through hard times and hard decisions are right on. (Oct. 1) Forecast: There are more than 21 million copies of the Don't Sweat books in print, and Carlson's loyal fans will unquestionably pick up this latest offering, which Hyperion will also make available in audio. A Good Morning America appearance and ads in USA Today should boost sales. (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved


Library Journal Review

With these two works, publishers continue to milk the desire for feel-good books. Acting more as a compiler than a writer, Allenbaugh serves up more bland, warm-and-fuzzy anecdotes la the successful "Chocolate" series (Chocolate for a Teen's Heart; Chocolate for a Mother's Heart). Women ranging from housewives to business professionals contributed 77 brief and sentimental stories that illustrate pluckiness in the face of adversity. "The Tattooed Stranger," for example, explores prejudice and how to overcome it. Carlson's book will rev the engines of self-helpers without kicking them into drive. Like many of his previous titles (Don't Sweat the Small Stuff), his latest is observational and general, with generic wisdoms that quickly become repetitive. Entries wax on a range of topics, including divorce, stress, and the grieving process. Carlson misses more than he hits, although good points sometimes emerge, e.g., in "Dedicate Yourself to Mindfullness," he exhibits uncharacteristic clarity in advising readers to experience thoughts and emotions peacefully. Of little practical use, this is more a pep talk than a means to an end. Read it in conjunction with more focused titles like T.D. Jakes's frankly Christian Woman Thou Art Loosed: Healing the Wounds of the Past. As with entries in the popular "Small Miracles," "Taste Berries for Teens," and "Chicken Soup" series, these books contain so much recycled material that libraries would be better off purchasing them only on demand. There are also serviceable single volumes like Barry and Joyce Vissell's Meant To Be: Miraculous Stories To Inspire a Lifetime of Love or Anna Quindlen's A Short Guide to a Happy Life. (c) Copyright 2010. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.


Table of Contents

Introduction
1. Learn from the Big Stuffp. 5
2. Ask Yourself the Question, "Will This Matter a Year from Now?"p. 11
3. Know That You Don't Know, and Then Step into the Unknownp. 17
4. Grieve Freelyp. 25
5. Prepare and Let Gop. 33
6. The Dance of Divorcep. 41
7. Overcome Aging Anxietyp. 47
8. Become a Healing Forcep. 55
9. Reflect on the Words, "You Must Be the Change You Want to See"p. 59
10. The Fiction of Failurep. 65
11. Illness and Injury: Are There Any Silver Linings?p. 73
12. Making It All Workablep. 79
13. Beware the Burden of a Busy Mindp. 87
14. Face the Truth with Loving-Kindnessp. 99
15. Surrender to Your Lack of Controlp. 107
16. Do Not Enter!p. 113
17. Dedicate Yourself to Mindfulnessp. 121
18. Know the Secret of Thoughtp. 127
19. Softenp. 137
20. Finding Life after Deathp. 141
21. Admit to Your Common Groundp. 147
22. Let Go of Your Pastp. 151
23. Survive Those Financial Setbacksp. 157
24. Catch and Releasep. 165
25. Reflect on What You're Going to Want to Say--Before You Need to Say Itp. 171
26. Straighten Your Patiencep. 179
27. Be All You Can Bep. 185
28. Treat Others As If They Were Going to Die--Tonightp. 193
29. A New Look at Stressp. 199
30. Rely on Optimismp. 207
31. Cultivate Your Compassionate Heartp. 217
32. Listen to Your Worldp. 225
33. Turn Toward Your Religionp. 235
34. Retirementp. 241
35. Big Stuff and Moodsp. 251
36. Meditationp. 259
37. Experience Calm Resolvep. 267
38. Forgivenessp. 273
39. Become Aware of the Mind-Body Connectionp. 281
40. Happinessp. 289