Cover image for Bullies : from the playground to the boardroom : strategies for survival
Title:
Bullies : from the playground to the boardroom : strategies for survival
Author:
Middelton-Moz, Jane, 1947-
Personal Author:
Publication Information:
Deerfield Beach, Fla. : Health Communications, [2002]

©2002
Physical Description:
xx, 207 pages ; 22 cm.
Language:
English
ISBN:
9781558749863
Format :
Book

Available:*

Library
Call Number
Material Type
Home Location
Status
Central Library BF637.B85 M53 2002 Adult Non-Fiction Non-Fiction Area
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Summary

Summary

Emotionally disturbing yet cathartic, this groundbreaking book by two leading experts in the field of community intervention, anger and addiction, provides a compelling expose on all aspects of bullying. Using in-depth case studies of bullies and those they bullied, Middelton-Moz and Zawadski provide a true look at the problem and what can be done to stop it.

Focusing on environments where bullying occurs most frequently--in schools, homes, relationships, workplaces and cyberspace--the authors identify six bullying strategies that encourage bullying behavior and provide concrete ways to defuse tense or potentially hazardous situations. Equally important, Middleton-Moz and Zawadski explain how to reach out to bullies with the appropriate guidance and support, without which bullies will only continue to create fear and anxiety in others.

No matter how hard they try, it is virtually impossible for parents to keep up with all the apps and technological changes that enable bullying to remain anonymous. To help them, the authors have included a chapter just for parents on how to monitor their children's behavior and online interactions to keep them grounded. For both parents and educators, Middleton-Moz and Zawadski also explore innovative anti-bullying programs and offer advice about which ones are really working. 


Author Notes

Jane Middleton-Moz has a masters degree in clinical psychology. She is the founder of Middleton-Moz Associates in Montpelier, Vermont, and Liberty Lake, Washington, and speaks internationally on issues of multigenerational grief and trauma and cultural and ethnic self-hate.


Reviews 1

Publisher's Weekly Review

The kid who steals lunch money, the overdemanding spouse, the boss who publicly berates an employee: no matter the age or the environment, if the cruelty they express is "frequent and systematic," they're bullies, say Jane Middelton-Moz and Mary Lee Zawadski. In Bullies: From the Playground to the Boardroom, the authors present interviews with the bullies and with the people they've abused; strategies to cope with (and avoid altogether) bullying situations; and analysis of playground, relationship and workplace bullies. ( Feb.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved


Excerpts

Excerpts

Bullying in Schools The National School Safety Center calls bullying "the most enduring and underrated problem in American schools." "As many as 8 percent of schoolchildren miss a day of class monthly for fear of being bullied. And in a nationwide survey, 43 percent of children said they were afraid to go to a bathroom for fear of being harassed" (Mulrine, 1999). Boys Are Creative and Sensitive and Have Feelings, Too Jim didn't fit the "macho" image required of him to fit in at his junior high school. He liked to read and played the piano instead of football. The "cool" kids teased him mercilessly. At least once a week, the "jocks" that lived in his neighborhood would gang up on him as he walked home from school. Sometimes they would tear his glasses off his face and toss them back and forth to each other over his head while shouting, "Hey, four-eyed wuss, where are your eyes?" Sometimes his glasses would get smashed in the process. He was on his fifth pair. He was afraid to tell his folks, afraid they wouldn't believe him or if they did, afraid of retaliation. He'd tell them he accidentally broke his glasses. After the first time, his mom and dad would lecture him endlessly on responsibility. He'd been grounded for a week each time and had to pay for the new glasses the last two times out of the money he'd saved for a new bike doing odd jobs for the neighbors. Early in life, children are classified and pigeonholed into subgroups or cliques in schools and neighborhoods according to looks, interests or behavior: "the popular kids," "the jocks," "the brains," "the preppies," "the geeks," "the freaks," "the nerds," "the outcasts," "the gooners," "the nobodies," "the faggots." Boys live in fear of not complying with the unspoken rules of how to belong: act cool, don't show your feelings, act tough, macho, bully or get bullied, be good in sports, don't appear too sensitive or "bookish," look good, and never cry, ask for help, or appear to be too close to your mom. In Real Boys' Voices, William Pollack describes the survival techniques that boys learn early to subscribe to the "Boy Code," and the need they feel to wear a mask throughout their lives, "When boys wear this mask, they completely repress their inner emotional lives and instead act tough, composed, daring, unflappable, laughing off their pain. They may wax strong and silent or lash out with fists and fighting words" (Pollack, 2000, p. 33). Without the mask, they run the risk of being bullied relentlessly. Often the mask requires that they bully or actively support their buddy who is bullying. Some can't take the constant pressure and abuse, see no way out, and become depressed and suicidal or strike out with fists and weapons. "The Boy Code, which restricts a boy's expression of emotion and his natural cries for help, has silenced the souls of our sons and paralyzed our natural instincts to reach out to them" (Pollack, 2000, p. 4). Girls Are Smart and Strong, and Come in A Excerpted from Bullies: From the Playground to the Boardroom by Jane Middelton-Moz, Mary Lee Zawadski, Mary Zawadski All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.

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