Cover image for Making intimate connections : 7 guidelines for great relationships and better communication
Making intimate connections : 7 guidelines for great relationships and better communication
Ellis, Albert.
Personal Author:
Publication Information:
Atascadero, CA : Impact Publishers, [2000]

Physical Description:
149 pages : illustrations ; 23 cm.
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Format :


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Material Type
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RC489.R3 E4438 2000 Adult Non-Fiction Central Closed Stacks

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This is the first book to apply Dr. Ellis's famous "Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy" principles to intimate relationships. The seven guidelines for better couple communication offered in this user-friendly guide emphasize non-blaming acceptance, integrity, mutual support, appreciation, replacing irrational ideas and expectations with realistic attitudes. An effective resource for couples seeking greater closeness, intimate partners who are willing to make "unilateral" changes, marriage and family therapists -- a breakthrough relationship guide from the father of rational therapy.

Author Notes

Albert Ellis was a clinical psychologist and a marriage counselor. He was born on September 27, 1913 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Ellis originated the rational-emotive therapy movement, which ignores Freudian theories and advocates the belief that emotions come from conscious thought "as well as internalized ideas of which the individual may be unaware." At first, Ellis' books on marital romance and sexuality were criticized by some as being radical and sensational; however, few realized that Ellis was merely laying the groundwork for modern sex education.

Ellis was educated at the City College of New York Downtown and at Columbia University, where he received a Ph.D. in psychology in 1943. He taught for a number of years at Rutgers University, New Jersey, and the Union Graduate School. He was executive director of the Institute for Rational Living, Inc., in New York City. Ellis was the author of Sex and the Liberated Man, Sex Without Guilt, and Sex Without Guilt in the Twenty-First Century.

Despite his health issues, Ellis never stopped working with the assistance of his wife, Australian psychologist Debbie Joffe Ellis. In April 2006, Ellis was hospitalized with pneumonia, and had to stay in either the hospital or the rehabilitation facility. He eventually returned to his home --- the top floor of the Albert Ellis Institute. He died there on July 24, 2007 in his wife's arms. Ellis had authored and co-authored more than 80 books and 1200 articles during his lifetime. He was 93 when he died.

(Bowker Author Biography)

Table of Contents

1. Chemistry, Connections, and Communicationsp. 1
2. The Challenge of Accepting Realityp. 11
3. Challenging Your "Shoulds" and "Musts"p. 19
4. Seven Guidelines for Great Relationshipsp. 31
5. Guideline 1: Accept Your Partner "As Is"p. 43
6. Guideline 2: Express Appreciation Frequentlyp. 51
7. Guideline 3: Communicate from Integrityp. 65
8. Guideline 4: Share and Explore Differences with Your Partnerp. 73
9. Guideline 5: Support Your Partner's Goalsp. 95
10. Guideline 6: Give Your Partner The Right To Be Wrongp. 103
11. Guideline 7: Reconsider Your Wants as Goalsp. 113
12. Using Commitment to Accomplish Your Goalsp. 121
13. Making The Seven Guidelines Work for Youp. 137
Selected Referencesp. 143
Indexp. 147