Cover image for The complete idiot's guide to a well-behaved child
The complete idiot's guide to a well-behaved child
Lutz, Ericka.
Personal Author:
Publication Information:
New York : Alpha Books, [1999]

Physical Description:
xxvii, 388 pages : illustrations ; 24 cm
Format :


Call Number
Material Type
Home Location
Item Holds
HQ770.4 .L88 1999 Adult Non-Fiction Non-Fiction Area

On Order



The 2003 edition of this handbook on international electronic countermeasures features expanded coverage of Russian, Eastern European and Chinese electronic warfare, electronic intelligence-gathering, and guided-weapon systems. It also contains new and revised entries for defence electronics systems from all nations. With system technical data, photographs and operational details, this resource should be of use to military and industry professionals who are concerned with defence electronics in the modern world.

Author Notes

Ericka Lutz is the author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Stepparenting and Baby Maneuvers, as well as co-author of Mom's Guide to Disciplining Your Child. Her parenting advice can be found online at Mother of a sometimes well-behaved six-year-old and stepmother to two wonderful 20-somethings, Ms. Lutz lives in Oakland, California.

Table of Contents

Part 1 Setting Up for Successp. 1
1 How to Raise a Well-Behaved Childp. 3
Parenting Well: It's Confusing, for YOU!p. 4
What Is Discipline, Anyway?p. 4
Discipline Quick Checkp. 4
Good Behavior, Here We Come!p. 5
The Road to Well-Behaved Childrenp. 6
The Twelve Disciplinary Elementsp. 6
Disciplinary Element Number One: Pay Attention to Your Childp. 7
Big and Little "Troubles"p. 7
Pay Attention! Easier Said Than Donep. 7
Disciplinary Element Number Two: Respect Your Children and Yourselfp. 8
Values, Communication, Internal Discipline, Trust, and Problem Preventionp. 9
"Hey John, Here's What's Important"p. 9
Who's Talking? Who's Listening?p. 9
Internalizing Discipline and Building Self-Controlp. 9
Trustp. 10
Steer Clear of That Problem!p. 10
Raising an Ethical Childp. 10
The Fantasy of Parental Controlp. 10
The Mighty Ruler and the Babyp. 10
Source of Security: You!p. 11
What Does Control Mean to You?p. 11
Focus on Positive Influencep. 12
Letting Them Gop. 12
The Discipline of Positive Disciplinep. 13
2 Parenting Styles: Wimpy, Bossy, or Strong and Reasonablep. 15
The Parenting Style Continuump. 16
A Quick "Hit" on the Parenting Continuump. 16
The Bossy Parentp. 17
The Wimpy Parentp. 17
The Strong and Reasonable Parentp. 17
Where Did You Get That Style?p. 18
"That Approach Is Not My Style"p. 19
When Parents Have Different Approachesp. 19
About Boundariesp. 20
Disciplinary Element Number Three: Be Reasonable, Gentle, and Firmp. 20
You, the Gentle Giantp. 21
Remember, It's Funny!p. 21
Quantity Time, Quality Energyp. 22
Let Your Child Do Itp. 22
The Loving Parentp. 23
Disciplinary Element Number Four: Prevent and Minimize Problems Through Understanding, Communication, and Modelingp. 23
Negative Modelingp. 24
It's the Golden Rulep. 24
Who's the Grown-Up Here, Anyway?p. 25
The FamilyMind Toolp. 25
Choosing Your Battlesp. 25
Enjoy Your Childp. 26
3 Setting Your Child Up for Successp. 27
Be Your Child's Allyp. 28
An Ally Is Unconditionalp. 28
An Ally Doesn't Always Approvep. 29
The Ally's Goal: Mutual Respectp. 29
Assume a "Good" Childp. 29
Assume a Resourceful Childp. 31
All You Need Is Lovep. 31
Showing Your Affectionp. 32
Appropriate and Inappropriate Affectionp. 32
Telling Her Your Affectionp. 33
Easy Listeningp. 33
Listen Firstp. 34
Always Listenp. 34
Create a Special Place or Time for Listeningp. 34
Active Listening: Your First Line of Defensep. 35
Let's Talk About Talking!p. 36
Tips for Talking With, Not At, Your Childp. 37
Tell the Truthp. 37
Keep Complaints Specificp. 38
Be Careful with Criticismp. 38
Nix the Nagging, Lose the Lectures, Avoid the Advicep. 39
Don't Set Them Upp. 39
De-Escalationp. 39
All About "I" Statementsp. 40
The "I" Statement Formulap. 40
Patience Is an Eight-Letter Wordp. 41
Justice and Fairnessp. 41
Unconditional Lovep. 42
4 Positive Reinforcement and Choicesp. 43
Disciplinary Element Number Five: Use Positive Reinforcementp. 43
It Works Like Thisp. 44
Tally Ho!p. 44
The "Let's Get Positive" Exercisep. 46
Prevent Problems with Descriptive Encouragementp. 46
It's Not Praise, and It's Not Generalp. 47
Reward Positive Behaviorp. 48
Natural and Logical Rewardsp. 48
Rewards Versus Briberyp. 48
Disciplinary Element Number Six: Teach Ways to Make Choicesp. 49
How Do Choices Prevent Problems?p. 49
Choice Expands with Agep. 51
Free Choice?p. 51
Choice Builds Strengthp. 51
Other Trouble-Preventing Techniquesp. 51
Just Ask Nicelyp. 52
Remove Temptationp. 52
Ignore It, It Will Go Awayp. 52
Society's Childp. 53
Part 2 Clearer Than Mud: Expectations and Goalsp. 55
5 Expectations for Your Childp. 57
What You Expect Depends on Who You Arep. 58
Disciplinary Element Number Seven: Set Reasonable Personal Expectations and Goals for Your Childp. 58
Who Is Your Child?p. 58
Adjust to Your Child's Levelp. 59
Charts, Graphs, Uneven Developmentp. 59
Personality-Appropriate Expectationsp. 60
It's All Temperamentp. 61
It's a Deadly Combop. 61
Temperament: Take a Positive Approachp. 62
Understanding Your Childp. 63
Special Time with Your Childp. 63
Special Time Ideasp. 63
So, It's All About Confronting Issues and Gut Spilling?p. 64
How Quantity Is Your Quality?p. 64
The Quality Time Quizp. 64
Minimum Quality Time in Two Minutes Flatp. 65
The World's Expectationsp. 65
Gender-Related Expectationsp. 65
Your Child's Expectations for Himselfp. 66
The Perfectionistp. 66
The Underachieverp. 67
Setting Reasonable and Achievable Disciplinary Goals for Your Childp. 67
You Goal, Girl!p. 68
Whose Goal Is It Anyway?p. 69
What Your Child Expects: From You!p. 69
Don't Overexpectp. 69
6 Normal or Naughty?p. 71
Disciplinary Element Number Eight: Set Reasonable Expectations for Your Familyp. 71
What's Normal for You?p. 72
Who Is Your Family?p. 72
If You Can't Beat 'Em, Join 'Emp. 73
Being an Allyp. 74
Keeping It Privatep. 74
What Does Your Family Expect?p. 74
Writing Your Family's Value Statementp. 75
Family Rules, the Family Jewelsp. 76
Use Family Rules Sparinglyp. 76
Family Rules Are Your Family Values in Actionp. 77
Family Rules Definition Exercisep. 77
Family Goalsp. 79
Family Meetingsp. 79
Clear Expectations in Action: A Clean Room?p. 81
Privacy Issuesp. 81
What Are You Modeling?p. 82
Making Cleaning Possiblep. 82
Clean? What Do You Mean?p. 83
One, Two, Clean!p. 83
7 Even Light Has a Speed Limitp. 85
Give That Child Some Limits!p. 85
Sounds Like a Family Value! Or Maybe a Rule!p. 86
Disciplinary Element Number Nine: Communicate Effective and Reasonable Limitsp. 86
Defining Limits for Your Childp. 86
Planning Aheadp. 87
Limits and Modelingp. 88
Making Limits Totally Clearp. 88
Processing the "Can I?"p. 89
Using Remindersp. 90
The Wiffle-Waffle and the Waffle-Wifflep. 90
Stay Flexiblep. 91
There's a Limit to Limits!p. 91
Not Sure About a Limit?p. 91
The Limit Changing Testp. 93
"One, Two, One, Two, Flex and Stretch"p. 93
Expand-a-Limit!p. 93
Reinstating a Limitp. 93
Rosie's Dance: Working with the Limitsp. 94
Part 3 Prevention's Great, but Sometimesp. 95
8 Why Is Johnny Naughty? What Am I Gonna Do?p. 97
Relax! Naughty Is Normalp. 98
Occasional Disobediencep. 98
Chronic Disobediencep. 99
"Good" Behavior, Plus or Minus 10 Percentp. 100
The Strong and Reasonable Parent Respondsp. 100
First, You Reactp. 100
Try to Cool Down and Gain a Little Perspectivep. 101
Separate the Deed from the Doerp. 102
Disciplinary Element Number Ten: Listen, Look for the Message, and Determine the Child's Needsp. 102
Gathering Information Through Proactive Listeningp. 103
Look at Family Dynamicsp. 104
Look for the Message Behind the Actionp. 104
The Four Mistaken Goals of Misbehaviorp. 104
Child's Mistaken Goal: Undue Attentionp. 105
Child's Mistaken Goal: Powerp. 105
Child's Mistaken Goal: Revengep. 105
Child's Mistaken Goal: Giving Upp. 106
Many Misbehaviors, Many Reasonsp. 106
Honor the Positive Intentp. 107
Determine Your Own Needsp. 108
Respondp. 108
9 Consequences: Natural, Logical, and Consistentp. 111
What's a Consequence?p. 112
Consequences Are Not Punishmentsp. 112
Natural and Logical Consequencesp. 112
It's Only Natural!p. 112
Logical Consequencesp. 113
Disciplinary Element Number Eleven: Provide Related, Respectful, Reasonable Consequences to Misbehaviorp. 114
Related Consequencesp. 114
Respectful Consequencesp. 114
Reasonable Responsesp. 115
Rewarding Consequencesp. 115
Explicit Consequencesp. 116
Choosing Consequencesp. 116
Defining Consequences Ahead of Timep. 117
When You're on the Spotp. 118
Letting the Child Decidep. 118
Avoiding Inappropriate Consequencesp. 118
Disciplinary Element Number Twelve: Be Consistentp. 119
Inevitability, Not Severityp. 120
No Waffles at This Breakfast Tablep. 120
Kids Make Your Wees Go Kneakp. 120
Consistency: When It's a New Skillp. 120
Follow Throughp. 121
Faulty Consequences and Flexibilityp. 121
10 Effective, Dubious, and Destructive Disciplinary Consequencesp. 123
The Effective Big Sevenp. 124
Educationp. 124
Expressing Disapprovalp. 125
Having a Little Discussionp. 125
Ignoringp. 126
Separation and Replacementp. 127
Time-Outs (Also Known As "Thinking Time")p. 127
Warningsp. 128
The Dubious Sixp. 129
Assigned Readingp. 129
Caring for a Younger Siblingp. 130
Choresp. 130
Constructive Criticismp. 130
Groundingp. 131
Removing Privilegesp. 132
Spanking and Why Not Top. 132
The Destructive Eightp. 134
Guilty of Imposing Guilt?p. 134
Humiliation Hurtsp. 135
Hurtful Talkp. 135
Physical Abusep. 137
Punitive and Retaliatory Actionp. 137
Threatsp. 138
Trapsp. 138
Withholding Affectionp. 138
Creativity Countsp. 138
Part 4 Putting It to Workp. 141
11 Day-by-Day Disciplinep. 143
The Well-Mannered Childp. 144
Mornings and Evenings: Getting Them Up, Getting Them Downp. 144
Moody Morningsp. 145
When Mornings Are Miserablep. 145
Beastly Bedtimesp. 147
When Bedtime Is Agonyp. 148
Some Enchanted Evening Suggestionsp. 148
Getting-There Hasslesp. 149
Mealtime Strugglesp. 149
The Dirty Childp. 151
Food, Shelter, and Clothing!p. 151
Getting Dressed, Getting Undressedp. 152
Don't Be Revilin' Her Stylin'p. 152
Play Dates and PlayMatesp. 153
Lessons and Other Activitiesp. 154
12 Behaviors and Relationshipsp. 157
Verbal Misbehaviorp. 157
Whine, Whine, Whinep. 158
Foul, Filthy Languagep. 158
Battling Tattlingp. 159
Oh, That Sass!p. 159
Aggressive and Nasty Behaviorp. 160
When Your Baby's a Bullyp. 160
Cruella de Kidp. 161
When Your Child Has Been Excludedp. 162
When Your Child Is Chronically Victimizedp. 162
Lying, Cheating, and Stealingp. 162
Lying Larryp. 162
Ethics and Liesp. 163
Why Do Children Lie?p. 163
Lie Prevention Techniques (And That's the Truth!)p. 164
Seven Quick Steps to Dealing with a Liep. 165
Cheating Child. Charming? Not!p. 165
Stealing Sidp. 166
Little Kids and Stealingp. 168
Fighting Physical Fightingp. 169
13 Teaching Responsibilityp. 171
What's Your Job?p. 172
Chores as Teaching and Consequencesp. 172
Chores as Earning Powerp. 173
Tasks for Kidsp. 173
Which Chores for Whom?p. 174
Charting the Choresp. 175
Getting Chores Donep. 176
Need More Responsibility?p. 176
"In a Minute, Mom": Dealing with Procrastinationp. 177
"But I Tried"p. 178
Homework Hasslesp. 178
Whose Homework Is It, Anyway?p. 179
Should Reading Ever Be a Consequence?p. 181
Kids and Moneyp. 181
The ABCs of Do-Re-Mep. 181
Ethics Through Sharingp. 182
Allowancep. 182
14 Discipline at School, at the Neighbor's, on the Roadp. 185
Behavior and Misbehavior Away from Homep. 185
School Disciplinep. 186
Socializing Struggles and Successp. 187
Problems at a Friend's Housep. 187
Other Parents and Disciplinep. 187
Events, Shows, Partiesp. 188
Restaurant Rowdinessp. 188
On Vacation or On the Roadp. 189
When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Crankyp. 190
Car Crazinessp. 190
Airplane Agonyp. 192
Hotel Horrors and Motel Misery?p. 193
Pride and Joy at the Well-Behaved Childp. 194
Part 5 Positive Discipline for Complex Familiesp. 195
15 Little Kidsp. 197
No Such Thing as a Bad Babyp. 198
Limits: You Set 'Em, They Test 'Emp. 198
Why Little Ones Misbehavep. 198
Value the Strugglep. 199
The Power of the "No"p. 200
Positive Reframingp. 201
The Positive Reframing Exercisep. 201
Disciplinary Techniques That Work with Little Childrenp. 202
Stop the Action and Look for the Positive Intentp. 202
Educatep. 203
Set Clear Verbal Limitsp. 203
Set Physical Limitsp. 203
Provide Choicesp. 204
Natural Consequencesp. 204
Use Active Listening and the "Sportscasting" Techniquep. 204
Time-Out Techniquesp. 205
Redirecting the Actionp. 206
Working with Troublep. 206
Temper Tantrumsp. 206
Biting, Hitting, Hair Pulling, and Other Violent Actsp. 207
16 Discipline and Your Adolescentp. 209
Teens, a Different Speciesp. 210
New Tactics Neededp. 210
Expectations, Againp. 211
Keeping Rebellion in Perspectivep. 211
Educating Yourself About Adolescencep. 212
Life as an Adolescentp. 212
Who Am I Today?p. 212
Body Image Problems: What Do I Really Look Like?p. 214
It's the Pals That Matterp. 214
Demoted!p. 215
The Work of the Adolescentp. 215
The Struggle Between Dependence and Independencep. 216
What You Can Dop. 216
Lateral Job Shift!p. 216
Conversation Countsp. 217
Relaxation!p. 218
Gaining Distancep. 218
Look to Your Childp. 219
Positive Reframingp. 219
When Life Gets Hardp. 219
Finding Adult Allies for Your Teenp. 220
Letting the Little Bird Flyp. 221
17 The Well-Behaved Stepfamilyp. 223
Step Lingo for Step-Somethingsp. 223
Discipline During Divorcep. 224
Discipline as a Stepparentp. 225
The Disciplinary Evolution of a Stepparentp. 225
Serving as Back Room Consultantp. 225
Standing Up for Your Own Needsp. 226
Operating as Designated Enforcerp. 226
Collaborating with Your Partnerp. 227
Performing Spontaneous Disciplinary Decision-Makingp. 227
Whatever You Decide: Respect the Established Family Valuesp. 228
Stepfamily Discipline Issuesp. 228
Who Are You, Anyway, Bub?p. 228
When Two Sets of Family Rules Collidep. 229
Discipline as a Stepdadp. 229
Discipline as a Stepmomp. 230
Combined Stepfamily Issuesp. 232
Who Lives Where, and with Whom?p. 232
When You're a Custodial Stepparentp. 232
The Half-and-Half Custodial Stepp. 233
Visitation Disciplinep. 233
When Your Kids Have a Stepparentp. 234
18 Double Discipline: The Tag-Teamp. 237
Parents, Team Players, and the Unified Frontp. 237
Developing a Unified Frontp. 238
When You Need to Talk About Itp. 239
Manipulation: It's Not Just for Politicians Anymore!p. 240
When You Don't Agreep. 240
But What If? The Unanticipated Situationp. 241
That's Between You, Me, and the Kids?p. 241
Good Cop, Bad Copp. 242
When the Partner's Awayp. 242
Wait a Momentp. 242
"And I Mean Now!"p. 242
Partners Need Trustp. 243
"Wait Until Your Father Gets Home!"p. 243
Discipline and Other Adultsp. 244
First, Flexibilityp. 244
Good Behavior and the Extended Familyp. 245
Grown Friends: Indulgence and Lovep. 245
Baby-Sittersp. 246
Other Kids' Parentsp. 247
The Influence of Teachers and Coachesp. 247
Ex-Partners and "Other" Parentsp. 248
Nosy Neighborsp. 248
Part 6 The Hardest Partsp. 251
19 The Fighting Familyp. 253
The Hot Winds of Ragep. 253
Respond, Don't Reactp. 254
Track Your Angerp. 255
Impatience! Tsk, Tskp. 255
The Icy Chill of Withdrawalp. 256
How to Use, Not Abuse, Your Angerp. 256
Resolving It Right!p. 257
The Four Ways of Resolving Conflictp. 258
Here It Comes! It's the Problem-Solving Process!p. 258
It's a Fair Fightp. 260
Sibling Strugglesp. 261
Fightingp. 261
Tales of Tattlingp. 262
Help Rebalance the Power!p. 263
Step-Sibling Squabblingp. 263
When Squabbling Covers Up Step-Sibling Sexual Interestp. 263
Wanna Trade?p. 264
20 The Well-Behaved Challenging Childp. 267
The Child with a Differencep. 268
The Spirited Childp. 268
Spirited Kids Are More Intensep. 268
Spirited Kids Are More Persistentp. 269
Spirited Kids Are More Sensitivep. 269
Spirited Kids Are More Perceptivep. 269
Spirited Kids Are More Uncomfortable with Changep. 270
Spirited Kids Are More Energeticp. 270
The Edison Traitp. 270
Convergent Versus Divergent Thinkingp. 271
The Dreamerp. 271
The Discovererp. 272
The Dynamop. 272
ADD and ADHDp. 272
Don't Leap to ADD!p. 273
If Your Child Is Diagnosed with ADD or ADHDp. 274
What About Drugs?p. 274
Neurofeedback Trainingp. 275
Planning for Successp. 276
Identify Your Child's Challengesp. 276
Identify Your Child's Strengths and Giftsp. 276
Identify Your Child's Behavior Problemsp. 276
Structure, Structure, Structurep. 277
Provide Physical Outletsp. 277
Minimize Distractionsp. 278
Simplify Instructionsp. 278
Consistency, Consistency, Consistencyp. 278
Create Successful Events and Activitiesp. 278
Relax Yourselfp. 279
Outside Assistancep. 279
Listen to Your Childp. 279
21 Sex and Drugs and the Well-Behaved Childp. 281
Drugs, Alcohol, and Your Baby!p. 282
The Frightening Factsp. 282
Choices, Choicesp. 284
The Joy of Drugsp. 284
No, No, I Didn't Say It Was Okay!p. 285
What's Wrong with Using Drugs?p. 285
How Are You Gonna Cope?p. 285
It's Legal. So What?p. 287
Using, Misusing, Abusingp. 287
Pressure!p. 287
"Yeah, Mama, I'm Smokin'!"p. 288
When Your Child Is Abusingp. 288
Sexuality and Your Childp. 288
Puberty Marches Inp. 288
Sex Ed: It's Not Just a School Thingp. 289
When Should You Start Sex Education?p. 289
What Should You Say?p. 290
AIDS and Other Sexually Transmitted Diseasesp. 292
Pregnancy: It Still Happensp. 292
When Your Kid Is Sexually Activep. 292
Talking About Homosexualityp. 293
What About Your Own Misguided Youth?p. 293
22 Trouble on the Home Frontp. 295
How Do You Know If Your Child Is in Trouble?p. 295
When the Skies Are Cloudyp. 296
Changes at Schoolp. 296
Changes in Friendsp. 296
Changes in Behavior at Homep. 297
What You Can Do and What You Cannot Dop. 297
Self-Abuse, Eating Disorders, and Addictionp. 298
Self-Abusep. 298
Eating Disordersp. 298
Depressionp. 300
Substance Abuse and Addictionp. 301
Relationship Abusesp. 302
When Your Child Runs Awayp. 302
When You Discover Misbehaviorp. 303
Outside Misbehavior: Legal Misbehavior and Crimesp. 303
When You Get That Callp. 303
Facing Your Childp. 305
Getting Helpp. 305
How Bad Is Bad?p. 306
The Private Face, the Public Facep. 306
The Violent Child, Our Violent Societyp. 306
The Demonized Teenagerp. 308
Last Resortsp. 308
Rebuilding Trust, Rebuilding Confidencep. 309
Part 7 Finding Balance and Serenityp. 311
23 You're Human Too, You Knowp. 313
Respecting Your Own Parenting Strugglesp. 314
When the Going Gets Toughp. 314
This Family Is Not Dysfunctional!p. 314
Tools for Improving Your Self-Respectp. 315
A Strong and Reasonable Parent: A Real Parentp. 316
Guilt: The Good and the Grossp. 317
The Millennium Lifestyle: A Cause for Guiltp. 317
When Guilt Destroysp. 318
Guilt, Be Gone!p. 318
Guilt Is Lousy Modelingp. 318
Guilty of Guilt?p. 318
Even Strong Parents Laughp. 319
Egads, I Laughed!p. 319
When Laughter Is Inappropriatep. 319
Treating Yourself Reasonably Wellp. 320
Give-Yourself-a-Break Suggestionsp. 320
Create Your Own Pamper Listp. 322
It's Unconditional Love, Not Unconditional Likep. 322
Nobody's Perfect, Everybody Errsp. 324
About Failure and Trying Againp. 324
Love Is Saying You're Sorryp. 325
It's Never Too Late for Changep. 325
24 Get a Grip: Get a Helping Handp. 327
Turning to Others for Helpp. 327
Who Gets the Help?p. 329
Finding a Therapistp. 329
Who Will It Be Now?p. 329
Getting Onep. 330
What's with All Those Letters?p. 331
Getting a Good Onep. 332
Paying for Itp. 332
The Interview and Initial Sessionp. 333
Support Groupsp. 334
Parenting Classesp. 335
Alternative Stress-Reducing Therapiesp. 335
Force Yourself to Relax!p. 336
The Progressive Relaxation Exercisep. 336
25 Building Family Togethernessp. 339
Building a Strong Family Identityp. 339
Family Timep. 340
Food for the Belly, Food for the Familyp. 341
Family Vacationsp. 343
Celebrating Your Familyp. 343
Your Family Heritage and Cultural Pridep. 344
Family Stories: Real and Mythologicalp. 345
Building Your Own Ritualsp. 346
Celebrating Your Childrenp. 347
Family Treats in Hard Timesp. 347
Spiritual Explorationp. 347
Creative Expressionp. 348
The Disciplinarian as Interdisciplinary Artistp. 348
Taking an Artistic, Interdisciplinary Approach to Disciplinep. 348
Creativity Supports, Nourishes, and the Child Flourishesp. 349
Ways to Raise a Creative Childp. 349
Community Commitmentp. 350
Community Servicep. 351
Building Your Personal and Family Support Networkp. 351
Focus on the Processp. 351
A Glossaryp. 353
B Books and Other Resourcesp. 357
C Where Can You Turn for Help?p. 359
D Disciplinary Examplesp. 363
E How to Hold a Brainstorming Sessionp. 365
F The Kid-Time Exercise Sheetp. 367
G What's Your Priority?p. 369
H What's Your Temperament?p. 373
Indexp. 375