Cover image for I was a better mother before I had kids
I was a better mother before I had kids
Borgman, Lori.
Personal Author:
Publication Information:
New York : Pocket Books, 1999.
Physical Description:
xi, 196 pages ; 23 cm
Format :


Call Number
Material Type
Home Location
Item Holds
HQ759 .B655 1999 Adult Non-Fiction Open Shelf

On Order



In a humorous anthology of essays and meditations, the popular columnist from the Indianapolis Star shares her thoughts on the mysteries and complexities of parenthood and family life.

Reviews 1

Publisher's Weekly Review

Jean Kerr, Erma Bombeck, Dave Barry, Anna Quindlen and countless others have been exploring the subject for years, and now Borgman, a nationally syndicated columnist and mother of three, follows directly in their path in this somewhat uneven but overall worthwhile collection of her columns. As she hits on the usual topics (dieting and cooking, pets, family vacations, clutter, celebrating Mother's Day, husbands and cooking) readers will nod knowingly, all but finishing her sentences (which in this genre is not necessarily a bad thing.) Some of her one-liners are inspired, for example on driving with your teenager: "You take the passenger seat while the kid you still have to tell three times to shut the refrigerator door slides in behind the steering wheel." Others, especially the bits about dieting, have been done before. She's pretty good at capturing those familiar bittersweet moments, and sometimes she can be acerbic, as when she describes the dreaded disease "affluenza" afflicting many families. However, she can be sentimental and preachy about the good old daysÄand sometimes what might have been a good read in the nightly paper doesn't work as well in book form. But at her best, Borgman will make parents laugh aloud or bring tears to their eyes. (Apr.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved

Table of Contents

1 Not Even a Girl Scout Would Have Been Prepared for This I Was a Better Mother Before I Had Kids Cool, Calm, and Crazy What the Experts Never Told You Grunt Once for Yes A Touch Off-center
2 The Hours Are Bad, But the Perks Are Good Unsolved Mysteries Interrogation 101 Accidents Can Be Prevented 88 Keys to Parenting Priceless Junk Whole Lot o' Nuttin Goin' On Blue with the Flu Fun with Ferrets Calling All Clothes Shampoo Madness
3 Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall, Lie Through Your Teeth Pregnant on Prime Time Battle of the Bulge You Call This a Swimsuit? Cry Your Way to Health Only Two Weeks to Beautiful Driven to Diet Walkin' and Gawkin
4 I Cook, Therefore I am "Wattsfirdinner? Field of Greens Just Grill It Misdemeanor Recipes Brownies Spoken Here
5 Household Hazards The Great Appliance Rebellion Hints from Hell-oise Unfinished Projects Mechanically Challenged The $64 Tomato Downsizing Housework Get the (Cheep) House of Your Dreams Does Not Compute Martha Stewart and Me
6 For Better or for Worse Wedding Vows: Take Two Bundles of Fun A Tale of Two Storms Honey Can't Find the Mustard We Do Taxes Thermostat Tag Romantic Ebbs and Flows The Long Good-bye
7 The Heart of Things Work Is Not Optional Watch Your Wallet Are We Rich? Down in the Polls Affluenza Charlotte's Friends Common Sense, R.I.P. Kids with Everything and Nothing
8 Shopping Daze Jean Jamboree Respect That Receipt Red Plaid Ritual Surfing for Bargains Dressing Room Revenge Underwear Happiness Accident on Aisle Two
9 Are We Having Fun Yet? Joy Ride Fight for the Front Seat Postcards from the Edge -- of Nebraska Vacation Voted Most Boring What's So Great About the Great Outdoors?
10 Let's Talk Speechless Make Momma Happy Berry Dangerous To Switch or Not to Switch My Mother's Voice So Sorry Please Don't Call It Nagging If It Walks Like a Crab and Talks Like a Crab
11 Holiday Hustle How Do I Love Thee? The Perfect Mother's Day When the Ants Go Marching In Christmas in July Mary with the Dark Blue Nose Over the River
12 Hang on to Hope The Big Muddy In the Blink of an Eye Of Lace, Linens, and Tea Bridging the Gap Of Gershwin and Pickles Edison, Einstein, and Twits Home Alone The Bluebird of Freedom
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